Lord Help Me!

Reality is starting to set in and quite honestly it is starting to freak me out. I have been trying to push it back and just not think about it. The other day I had a discussion with a friend of mine and she said "isn't your husband's busiest time of the year going to be right when you have the baby? what are you going to do?'" That is when I admitted to myself and out lout that I have been trying not to think about it. Not only is December right smack in the middle of basketball season but Chris is even going to be even busier this year (if that's possible) as he is coaching ALL the boys basketball pretty much by himself.  He is a trooper and I admire that in him but it's starting to realize the magnitude of this for our family.  Even though I will be happy to be no longer pregnant, I am kind of wishing the baby could just stay put for oh a couple of years!
As most of you know this pregnancy was a surprise. Nash's was planned right down to the letter. Hence him being born in the summer so that Chris would be off as well. Since this pregnancy wasn't so much planned (by us anyways) I am freaking out a little. With Nash, about a month before we started trying I got Aflac and got pregnant the  next month. Aflac helped with our hospital bill and helped with some of my unpaid time off.
This time I don't really have a plan. So financially (which if you know me well) I am a little freaked out to say the least.
Also just the everyday aspects of having a 3 year old and an infant freak me out. Nash will still be going to school so that will help me have some alone time during the day with just the baby but I am not quite sure how I am going to handle the rest of the time with pretty much being by myself a lot of that time. Also, night time freaks me out.  Nash isn't always and actually very seldom sleeping in his bed all night. WE HAVE GOT TO WORK ON THAT because I don't know how that is going to work with a 3 yr old in my bed and an infant sleeping in my room waking up every two hours to eat. Lord help me.
I do think that Nash is going to be a good big brother and will be helpful but let's be realistic. He's only 3 and is quite the momma's boy. I know he is going to be wanting me some too and not be crazy about all the time I will have to give to Griffin. So yeah I am freaking out a little because I am quite sure December will sneak up on me in no time and all these fears and reality will come flooding at me. Maybe I will win the lottery and be able to afford people to do things for me to make my life easier and/or I can stay at home and maybe have to time to do all that I will have to do to make life function with two kiddos.

 Note to self: MUST START  PLAYING THE LOTTERY. I am quite sure my sanity is going to be in jeopardy come this December and I may lose it and never get it back.  For now though, back in to my mode of let's just not think about it.